LIFE 101 | “you’ll be looking at the city and I’ll be looking at you” 18+

It’s pathetic, fuck it. I said it. It’s to soon to feel this way but I know when I have someone, and when they have me – I was laying awake not knowing what to do or how to tell you i love you, I’m so blessed to have you in my life, I’m so blessed to grab the bed sheets and pull them over the corner, looking up at your epic green eyes, you’re the only people who ever made sweat run down the centre of my body, like, it can split me in two.  Trusting my body towards you, I never thought thought I’d meet someone who could make feel alive just by saying my name | the human memory is intoxicating and will not allow me to forgive or forget your touch, just as you can’t forget my crooked smile and lip bites (and well.. you know)  – my phone can go ring, I can get a text or someone sent me a snap and I can smile knowing always when it’s you – it always starts with a hello and good intentions but I can’t help but trip over myself trying to know the words of the ending – I love being with you, acting like we are children with the world at our finger tips, driving for hours when you know I’m not home just to see me smile.

Knowing someone feels the exact same way as you doesn’t mean that you should go saying it to soon, where is the rush? It’s like we live in a world now where we have to fit properly like our hands, knowing I wouldn’t ask you to change a part of you, and I don’t think you’d ask me to change a part of me. You know when someone comes into your life and it’s a complete accident but when you get home you feel like, like how could I have wasted so much time and  energy

The city

“Love is a feeling, a feeling of happiness. Love is powerful, too powerful to play with. This feeling is strange and hard to describe, but when you fall in love, you will know it inside.”

But maybe it’s not about wasting anything, I believe and you can ask any single person who is no longer in my life or who has meant something to me that someone will come into your life when you need something from him or her – in no way do I mean you’re going to end up using that person it’s just there is certain people who need to teach us a lesson or teach us something that we forgot but we should have always remembered and it’s completely true, sometimes it is exactly what it is. Sometimes it’s hard to say goodbye and sometimes it’s even hard to accept hearing goodbye. But that’s not where I believe this whirlwind of a story is about  to take me – if anyone can tell you one thing about me it’s that I can easily get inside your head and make you do things you didn’t think you would do and it’s not that I mean to do it by any means at all, if I want something, I get it. If I want you, you’re mine. It’s like being shot and told to hold on or don’t close your eyes but sometimes it feels so good to close your eyes. Just the thought that you may have found your one-and-only can be so thrilling. But, the early stages of falling in love can be as frustrating as they are wonderful. Your new love life may consume your energy, focus, and time to the point where everything else going on in your life may feel like a rude intrusion. You can’t stop thinking about your lover. You get up and go to sleep obsessing about the relationship and what your future will look like together.

fantastic fantasy

To some of you, this reaction to love may seem over board. But, many of you know first-hand how falling in love can turn you into an obsessed, needy, and insecure person for a time. You don’t have to have emotional issues from the past to feel this way. Of course, if you do, this stage will be particularly difficult for you. Remember, the saying is not staying balanced in love, it is falling, losing your self to love. So, if you are in the early stages of falling in love right now, and you feel a little crazy, don’t worry, you kind of are. You are under the influence of your hormones that are making you feel, all at once, euphoric, endangered, and exhausted.

Keep trust in yourself as you grow. And as your mind expands and you begin to change as human being – sometimes so you don’t miss the real thing or fall face first it’s okay to take it slow and express yourself in other creative ways. 

At the end of the day, when the entire world turns it’s back on you, you’ll always have yourself. 


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